Monday, 29 October 2007

The rest of your life, aged 5

Philippe: Mr Bear, what will the rest of my life be like?

Cornelius Bear: Well, I suppose you'll enter grade school, were you'll preoccupy yourself with conspicuously eating only the most popular items. Then you'll go to college, where you'll form an experimental band that will do controversial things, like play in 15/23rd time and shower together. After college, you'll take a trip to the southern California desert, where you'll eat plants that your parents despise, and realise that you are fantastic. From there you'll attempt to write the great American novel, and support yourself if ways not of your choosing. Hopefully sooner rather than later you'll crack open a book that is older than Coca-Cola and realise that here, under the sun, there is nothing new left to be written. Once you recover, you can just rattle of what you like and sell it by the pound.

Philippe: Wow, I get to take a shower with a band? Totally cool!

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